In mediation, we work to make space to have conversations that you have not been able to have on your own, which can help you to have closure, and to move forward without needing to keep rehashing the past.
Continue reading “Will Mediation Benefit Us If We Have No Kids?”Separation or Divorce?
The answer to this is personal, and it depends where you are both at. Are you 100% sure that you are headed for divorce? Or is there a chance of separating for a few months, a year, even 3 – and then reconciling? Do you feel that you would not be able to date if you are still married? Is one of you on the other’s health insurance?
There are three differences between signing a full separation agreement and living apart, according to its terms, and filing for a divorce.
Continue reading “Separation or Divorce?”Mediation or Collaborative?
Is mediation or collaborative divorce the right fit for you?
After you decide that you are going to separate, the first questions you want to answer are: What process will work best for you both? Who are the professionals who can help you to find the steps through to this next phase of your lives? Do you both want to try mediation with a neutral third person to help facilitate your conversation? Or would you prefer to have your attorney sitting next to you during your negotiations?
Continue reading “Mediation or Collaborative?”Is Mediation Right for Me?
8 Reasons To Try Mediation:
1. Faster Path to Closure:
You may have been wronged – but getting stuck in conflict, and seeking revenge, will only keep you thinking about and tallying up – reliving – those hurts. The goal of mediation is to wrap up this part of your life, resolve and settle, so that you can move forward to your new and (hopefully) happier future, without the conflicts of the past. Let them go!
2. Neutral:
Moving from Litigation to Mediation
In mediation, we start from an underlying premise that we can find a place which will meet the needs of all members of the family. This is not always the case in litigation and often times the needs of the family get lost in a power struggle full of fear & defense.
Can high conflict couples mediate?
Six Things Your Litigator Doesn’t Want You To Know
Six Things Your Lawyer Doesn’t Want You To Know
OR – Why You Should Mediate Your Divorce
- Children
- Your children will never thank you for destroying their other parent
- Children always know the truth of their parents’ divorce. They will focus on it, and listen carefully to everything they hear, and piece together the story.
- The longer you are embroiled in conflict, the longer before your children can settle back into being normal kids – focusing on school, friends, music, soccer – and not on the conflict between the two people they love most in this world.
Continue reading “Six Things Your Litigator Doesn’t Want You To Know”
Mediation v. Litigation
I was called in for a court-ordered mediation for a post-divorce couple, about to have a trial. Mother requested a custody change.
This couple are very wealthy – a walking advertisement for the idea that having a lot of money is a disadvantage when you’re getting divorced. (Because you can get sucked into litigation.)
Why Mediate?
I usually begin mediation sessions by asking a couple why they are coming to mediation. This helps people to remember what kind of process and outcome they are hoping for – as well as lets me know how much they know about the process.
I met with a new couple last week, and when I asked them this question – I was blown away by their answers! In 5 minutes, they described the most idealistic mediation process, and highlighted (what I see as) the benefits of mediation. They said: Continue reading “Why Mediate?”