November 5th, 2016
Just watched the first episode of the new HBO show, “Divorce.”
They got so many things right. The humanity, pain and flaws that are in us all.
The irritation that we all feel with their spouses about petty little things when you’ve been married for decades. And yet, the way we end up knowing them inside and out, including their digestive schedules.
The way that a random little aside can trigger a huge fight. (Because, of course, it’s not random, and it’s not little. It’s part of a continuing conflict, that you return to to pick and pick and pick at.)
The appeal of the affair, the glittering idea that there is somewhere you can go and get back to your former life. The life that was there before you got married and had kids, where you can focus on just yourself, you can just have pleasure and escape and freedom. And how quickly that myth was shattered, when she told her lover that she was leaving her husband. “But you have children,” he said, with obvious consternation – revealing that he had no interest in being part of a future with her children.
The way that the husband said, “Let me give you an orgasm that will make everything okay,” trying to think how to fix things, and going straight to sex.
And then how I shuddered at the end when he said “I’m going to make sure that your kids hate you.” Kids will never thank you for making them lose their connection to their other parent. And yet – parents (married, separated or divorced) say the exact wrong things to their kids every day, because we are all flawed humans, and it’s realistic. And in the pain of recent separation, with all your nerve endings glowing, you can’t always see the big picture, and find your higher self.
Very painful show but good so far. I will watch the second episode.